Scream

i don't want this.... not now
pieces of your time of your precious time.
words of your bored mind.
smiles when pretending or thinking of how fucking stupid! my existence is .
of your unwanted freedom of your simple imagination that I am slowly shrinking.

I don't want this..... not now

I don't doubt it your vicious love,
but your presence it simply does not feel the same.
why the sudden changes
-attitude
-voice
-excitement
-thoughts
-connection
I am literally convinced
this is something your gently loosing interest in.
I’m completely stupid for following you knowing the dam truth.
I don’t want this not now
JUST SAY IT

blind hatred

"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality"

John Lennon.

springfield(:

lol i found it in my documents i was soo happy

GAGA! oh lala!

UUH!!!! this class period is extremely boring
any ways i figured i shouldn't write
specifically about whats surrounding me at this very moment
so I'll let it guide me to where ever I'm suppose to be.

PKSF♥

how much I'm loving this picture (:
i can honestly say its my favorite picture. I don't quite know how to describe this.
Am i suppose to make a love poem or something of that existence?
well if that's the case I'm sorta blank sorry
this guy apparently takes all my thoughts, and
i really cant think of anything but his actual presence

hahaha lol.... so we where sitting there not bored!! well at least i wasn't
and i notice i see his reflection through a shade some what dim and smazy
OK, but my point is he looked hot (;
so i try taking this memory into a piece of art (photograph)
but he moves: uhhhh WHY did you move?! any who
i still love it because in a weird way it reveals his actual personality

What i do know is I'm defiantly
Printing it Keeping it and Saving it Forever
i love you

You

You know I love you and only you...
David & Janette.

Eyyyy its you :D

Hell with this uhh

Don't lecture me of how beautiful love can be and how
special this day is. Of how love is magical and "oh" so powerful
this time everything is gonna change because he's the one
the one, and you know it you feel it. Its this feeling you get.....and and and
cut the crap you've said that before and look you have another guy in your life
I'm not writing this to be against love or this particular day
but come on why pick a day out of the whole entire year
to be nice and demonstrate how much you love that certain someone
shouldn't your job be to show it everyday but any who

I'm pretty sure this day will be filled with warm and fuzzy lovely stuff
RED WHITE AND PINK, hearts everywhere, fancy restaurants jewelry blahblahblah
on the other hand it will also be filled with porn with condoms sex and beer
for others in this case people that think like me
its an ordinary day filled with hypocrisy and fake laughs, but whatever
i got that feeling of writing of how this day made me feel

for those who are in the "oh he bought me a present therefore he must love me"
WRONGGGGG! (frame of thought) i hate to break it to you but
Those flowers will die.
Those chocolates will produce pimples.
That jewelery will soon be lost.
material goods are not a measure of love!
sure its the thought that counts all those things are quite nice
they are a symbol of how he thinks of you, but don't just get
satisfied with goods! They have to show you not give you! love

To me love should be shown everyday for the rest of your time
not just on a cheap crappy day. That a guy (who knows who?)
chose to call valentines day .........so get bent..fuck things up tonight
for material things are all this world seems to care about
ahhh! and for those who seem to actually love Congratulations
i myself love someone too(:

Its been like this all the time. For now

i feel the need to let you know

you've become an addiction

i cant let you go

(::::

Dahlia!!

i love this flower its so vivid full of color
it it excites my senses ....simply alive
its hard to believe that something so beautiful
lives! and that's why i decided Dahlia is the future
name i wanna hear the future name i wanna scream at! (:

the future name that reminds me of true beauty

FukFukFuk!!!!!!

i try not to

but i'm water and

this place is the sink

What a dramatic ending to the story

I have this weird way of healing my pain
its become a theme. I honestly feel better when
i take pictures of my injuries
this is when i squished my finger .......ouch!!

and when i cut my foot


yeahhhhhh {o.O}

broken bones

I'm down but i had to
i needed time to write this surely it makes no sense
but it means the world to me

for once i explained my feelings


Been trying to let go of this weak and false feeling
I'm not completely free
i cant really bruise this sense out
i cant fold it leave it and run off
it finds its way back to me
its attached to me like glue
I'm somehow connected to it it signifies whats wrong out there
but i just cant seem to be free from it
please oh please let it fucking leave

it enters my mind and it controls everything i stand for
I'm not my self this is not me!
mistake follows mistake
i cant say that !
its not what i believe in
oh god i didn't wanna say that

I'm sorry but deep down I'm really not
I'm sorry for acting like this but I'm really glad
sorry i didn't it mean it like that but yet i cant take it back its there
laying floating waiting for someone to bring it up and then explode

sorry? WHAT its simply not enough
for its my fault why should you apologize?

but understand its not me!

this simply crushed my senses my train of thought
it causes opinions..... opinions that shouldn't be heard
but yet i cant stop my self from saying sorry